PAX: Enron, Pope, Goose, Roxbury, Doxbury, Popeye

AO: Tuesday Tough, 02-03-2026

By: America’s Best

6 men gathered this morning to unknowingly pay tribute to the late great Bob Weir. Unknowingly because most of them had no idea who he was.

Warmarama

Then the first thing: It’s time to learn some things about Bob Weir (as I said, for many this morning we had to start with who in the world he is)
One question, many burpees:
How old was Bob when he joined the band he’s most famous for being in?
Enron: 22?
Incorrect, 6 burpees for the PAX
Pope: 18?
Incorrect, 2 burpees for the PAX

“AHA! I see the pattern.”
-everyone except Dox

Dox: 21?
Incorrect, 5 burpees

Everyone else knew the answer at this point-can’t remember if it was Roxbury or Popeye who actually voiced it tho.

The next thing:

Listen to “Promised Land” while holding a coupon. Goblet squat on every city, overhead press on every state.
YHC did not figure in that it was almost impossible to hear these lyrics. Once I noticed that everyone was just squatting and pressing when I did, I just randomly did a lot of thrusters. Even when there were obviously no lyrics, most of the PAX followed along.

The next thing: Dora with changing MOT each song. If anyone could identify the song, they could pick the next MOT from my list.

The Dora:
100 OHP
200 curls
300 air squats
200 curls
100 BBS

The MOTs:
Song 1: “Greatest Story Ever Told”
MOT: Tower of Power (ok it’s not a “T”, but it’s pretty cool. And my knee hurts)

Since YHC was pretty sure that nobody knew this song title, I gave them an out: if anyone could identify one of the three (or possibly four) biblical figures mentioned in the song, that would count.
I heard “Moses” as a guess from a few of the PAX, and that ended up being their (correct) final answer.
(The other 3 are Abraham, Isaac, and Gideon. Sorry Pope, I believe Zerubabel is in a Third Eye Blind song).
Goose chose Bear Crawl next.

Dox smugly nodded, and knowingly quipped, “Moses in a lot of rock songs.”
Whispers for quote of the year.

Song 2: “Samson and Delilah”
Goose got the first half of the title, and YHC was gracious enough to spoon feed him the rest. He chose flying nuns next.

Song 3 : “Mexicali Blues”
Song 4: “Victim or the Crime”
Song 5: “Throwing Stones”

We did some other MOT here, including the all-new “Squat Rockets,” which were more meh than expected.
My playlist had gone rogue and shuffled itself anyway, so it was time for the next thing.

Another trivia question. Following the end of the Grateful Dead what was Bob Weir’s next band? The clue given was the name is two animals each of which is three letters.
After just 3 guesses, YHC mercifully gave up on this game. The closest guess to the correct answer “Rat Dog” was ManBearPig.

The final thing:
Played Bob Weir’s version of the ancient hymn “Bye and Bye,” (yes that is the spelling… not sure why. Maybe we will understand that better… some other time in the future); we shoulder tapped on every “better” and merkined on each “by” (or “bye”).

Apparently dropping “Rat Dog” into the mind of Paradox created some sort of Nickelodeon stream of consciousness regression therapy event. He led us through CatDog to Ren and Stimpy… actually a welcome distraction from the numerous merkins and shoulder taps.

COT

BIODTL, NFA,
And of course,
SYITG,

AB